We tend to talk a lot about and so have a clear understanding of different issues in our lives.
We discuss meditation, talk about why mindfulness is so cool, or why self-awareness helps us become more successful.
BUT DO WE ACTUALLY DO THE WORK?
By reading and talking about something we do not ‘know it’. We gain a mental understanding of the topic but we do not have a personal experience of it, neither do we ‘own’ it.
Self-acceptance is one of such topics. Self-acceptance is something we ‘should’ do by practicing it and finding our the best way to go about it so to know we really ‘own’ it!
Mostly, we need to do the very things that we do not feel like doing because it is outside of our comfort-zone.
I would like to invite you to take this challenge and practice self-acceptance so you can experience it and own in.
The challenge will go on for a few days. Look for my posts daily to learn what you will do to practice and investigate what it is like for you to accept yourself.
Why?
It is Important to experience Self-Love and Acceptance. To learn to love ourselves unconditionally. We can free ourselves from the mind (judge and victim) and become who we came here to be. In self-acceptance, we can discover our gifts and begin to share these with the world. Until we focus into judging ourselves, it is unlikely that we can see and share our gifts. We can leave behind the negative thought processes and begin to vibrate a positive energy into our lives and the lives of those around us. When you discover the truth of who you are, you will no longer be attached to your pictures of perfect people or things to “make” you happy. Happiness will reveal itself gently in your life, and emerge from you…
“Emancipate yourself from mental slavery, none but ourselves can free our minds” Bob Marley
Challenge DAY1
In the morning listen to this very short meditation, then do the tasks throughout the day. See them below.
For the next 24 hours, catch yourself when you are seeking validation from the external world, whether from the people or the things around you. Remember, that these don’t define who you are.
During the day find some time to this. Write down 5 qualities or character traits you appreciate about yourself and include a time when these came into play. Suggestion: you may want to listen to the meditation again before you start doing the task.
Over the next week, look for things you appreciate about yourself to add to this list.
In the evening, before you go to bed, watch this video and do 5 rounds of tapping with 5 different issues. Follow the instructions in the video.
I recently created a new class/workshop that I call Compassionate Insight. It focuses on using this tool – Compassionate Insight – to create a better relationship with ourselves and as a result becoming happier and more contented regardless of the environment we find ourselves in.
At the links below read and listen more about my journey to compassion and what this tool comprises.
The answer is actually rather simple. It is because of our lack of self-care and lack of responsibility.
Let me explain it!
When we suffer in our lives and our needs are not met, we find it hard to feel compassion towards others’ needs and hearing others’ issues with openness and understanding.
Let me tell you about my journey of discovery!
One day, I was sitting through a six-hour meeting where people kept on forgetting to mute themselves so they caused a lot of background noise; some peoples’ audio was so bad that they were hardly audible; most of the time I could not figure out what the conversation was about because there was no structure to the meeting at all; people kept on interrupting each other (there were not guidelines introduced at the beginning) and the topics changed so abruptly that I could not follow the meeting. It was utterly chaotic.
Because I am on a practical journey of discovering compassionate insight, before the meeting, I decided to participate fully regardless of the challenges. I promised myself to stay compassionate and interested. I meditated and moved myself out of expectations and into a place of openness just before the meeting started.
An hour and a half into the meeting, however, I found myself extremely frustrated and exhausted. I was outraged at the way the meeting was conducted and how pointless my attendance was.
It made me think. How could I bring compassionate insight into this situation? What do I need to know now? What am I frustrated about? What are my unmet needs? How am I not taking care of my own needs right now?
I became aware of the following: I am constantly short of time. I have different jobs and responsibilities that leave me very little personal time. I am very particular about what I am willing to spend my time with. When it comes to education, I expect good level of education for my money. I need the meetings that I attend to be informative, well-organized, and well-conducted by an expert educator. This meeting, in my experience, was none of these. I was also frustrated because I was in no position to communicate my needs.
Hey! It sounds like a victim story!
I had to remind myself that I create my own reality and I am responsible for my experiences. Non-violet communication, or NVC in short, says that we need to fulfill a request like a child feeding ducks, with joy. In short the request was that I attend this meeting and participate fully. The truth is that I could not attend this meeting with joy, so I shouldn’t have! NVC also says that we always have choices and by knowing that we can stop playing the victim.
I was angry and frustrated because I felt like a victim. My needs for getting a good education was not met. But the truth is that my needs must be met by me. It is my responsibility to take good care of myself by making different choices.
Creativity is essential and our God given gift. There is none without creativity, except that we do not use our sense of creativity because we were told otherwise. Listen to this video on the importance of creativity on our mental health.
One of my greatest achievements as a human being on a spiritual journey is the conscious movement from fury to compassion.
I grew up in a country where disagreements were retaliated with dreadful consequences and children were train to be insensitive militarized robots. The education system were to take our will, our personality and our humanity. I was told numerous times what a worthless piece of sh*t I was. Mistakes were punished severely and we were only shown an imperfect and intolerant world that wants to shed our blood.
As a result, most of the people I know chose quiet desperation, I moved into resistance and fury. All I heard inside of me was: HOW DARE YOU?!? My fury was fueled by criticism and helplessness.
I spent decades criticizing the world around me with the conviction that this is my job to do that. I am a creative with fresh ideas, now I have a voice and I want to used it. I don’t think that there is anything wrong with communicating a need for change. However, there is a great difference between how this need is communicated. I learnt judgement so I used criticism. And the result was upset and disconnection.
Each time I criticized someone’s ideas or actions, they got upset with me and did not want to work or be with me any more. It is not to say that I did not have the right to express my disagreement but the way I did it was so harsh and critical that people moved into resistance, exactly the same way I did when I was a severely criticized child.
It took me a long time to understand that if I wanted to generate lasting change I needed to come from a loving and accepting place within myself that gives the other person the right to do what s/he thinks best. I don’t have to agree with it, but I must respect it.
Compassion is not giving excuses but knowing that everyone at any given moment in time is trying to do their best to meet a need regardless of my opinion on how they may attempt to do that.
Compassion assumes that everyone wants to meet their needs by the means available to them. These means usually steam from the beliefs systems that they grew up with.
Moving from anger to compassion removes the judgment. My inner critic who feeds on events that appear to be unjust or not good enough is now replaced by an observer.
In compassion, the observer wants connection instead of separation. The observer wants to generate change in ‘ togetherness’ which also means that it may not be possible. This topic is for another post! 🙂
Moving from fury to compassionate understanding is actually moving from separation to connection. In this action, I released anger about the way I was treated as a child and my fear of people. At the same time, I started opening to connecting and collaborating.
Inner communication allows you to have a LIFE FULFILLED!
Can you answer the following questions?
Where did I come from?
Why am I here?
Where am I going?
Listen to this vlog
What is inner communication?
Me, Myself, and I
The three parts of the self have been described in many ways over the years. In my understanding: Me is the small-self or the inner-child that drives our actions. S/he provides us with the enthusiasm and stamina to act in the world.
As you become more like a little child you will be more connected to your inner kingdom. Remember?
And said, Verily I say unto you, Except ye be converted, and become as little children, ye shall not enter into the kingdom of heaven. Matthew 18:3
S/he is also the part of us that communicates with the higher-self, the I. As you connect to your basic-self – the ME-Self, you will understand the messages of the higher-self more. The Me-Self is playful, joyful, enthusiastic, and selfish (in a sweet and innocent way!). The I, the higher-self, communicates to the basic-self the ‘Divine messages’ of your true purpose and meaning, mostly through the action of Gratitude. Through Gratitude we are supported to open and allow the necessary changes to happen.
Myself, is the conscious self. The conscious self gains clarity on who ‘I truly am’ and ‘how to express that’ through the communication between the Me-self (the inner child) and the I-Self, the Higher self. With that, the conscious self will become aware of what direction to take in life. S/he gains answers to life affirming questions such as: What I really want? What direction do I want to take in my life? Why am I here?
With the awareness of all that, we can start taking greater responsibility for our happiness and living the life we meant to live.
Are you aware of the inner voices that run you life?Are these inner voices supportive of you and help you become happy or against you? It is essential that we become aware of these voices. Some of these are old voices of different relatives and people we grew up with. Some of these voices need to be turned off and dismissed so they will stop running our life into directions that is not supportive of us or our purpose in life.
The Inner Voices of Truth
These three selves described above have ‘inner voices’ that you want to become aware of. We often do not listen to their voices because we are trained as children to listened to the ‘adults’ around us. Until the age of 7, we are in touch with ourselves and able to hear and know what is happening inside of us though we may not have had the means to communicate all that to the outside world. Then we started losing this connection because we turned outside towards our environment and took on some of their views and opinions instead of ours.
As a result, other’s sometimes negative emotional voices started running our life.
In order to have a happy and purposeful life you will need to reconnect with your ‘true-selves’, hear their voices and start acting upon them.
What to do?
First of all, we must take the time to listen within, so to speak. In meditation, in silent prayer and in pracitsing mindfulness you can gain insight into the different voices or tapes that run your actions (reactions). As we go through our days we need to stop and become aware of who is talking or who is guiding our actions right now by asking the question: Who is talking to me right now? With listening we can now start distinguishing what messages work for us and what do not.
The ones that do not work for us, we must dismiss or deny them and then overrun them with positive affirmations. We will eventually stop running these tapes and the unsupportive reactions that we developed along them.
As a result of gaining insight into your inner communication, you will uncover your own voices: the Me, the Myself and the I. As the three selves within become freed from the debris of ‘others’ ideas’, they become more God-aware. You will be able to act upon the God-aligned inner voices conveyed by the ME-Self or the basic self.
Key practises
Insight and Compassion
As we listen to our inner ‘tapes’ and look at mindfully our actions, reactions, and the words we use, we start becoming insightful of how we run our life and why. It can be a painful process to see how we limit ourselves. However, as soon as we become aware, we regain control over our choices.
As we walk the road of insight, we will soon discover that the child inside, the ME-Self, wants to be LOVED unconditionally. In return, s/he will provide us with the fuel to accomplish our dreams. So, if you want to have more energy and inner support for your ideas to become reality, it is imperative that you create a loving relationship with your inner-child, the ME-Self. You must embrace her/him with loving compassion, just as s/he is. Similarly, as you become aware of the limitations that you impose on yourself by listening to voices other than yours, you need to embrace these limitations and reactions with loving care or compassion.
Affirmations and Denials
bring alignment and clarity into our life. By practising affirmations and denials you start creating for yourself with knowing of yourself and of God. With affirmations you use the power of the spoken word to bring experiences forth for yourself that is life affirming and fulfilling. Affirmations are statements or small phrases that address an issue in your life with a sense of Gratitude.
Vision Boarding or Treasure Mapping
are visual affirmations. Whereas affirmations are usually written statements, vision boards or treasure maps are visual representations of affirmative statements. Similarly to written or spoken affirmations, they enable you to bring forth fulfilling experiences.
Gratitude
is a state of mind. The attitude of Gratitude brings forth life experiences that are both positive and supportive. In Gratitude, instead of focusing on lack and misery, we focus on the learning and God’s ever present Grace in our life. Similar to compassion, in Gratitude we embrace our life as it is. With that we become open and receptive to the goodness that is ever waiting for us to tap into.
Learn more about the programs I run to support you to develop your inner communication and insight:
Today, I looked at my journey of the past 40 days. I looked at some of the posts I created and shared and saw my ups and downs. I feel so much compassion and gratitude. I feel compassion towards parts of me who was challenged, who was in pain, who shed tears, and who was angry and upset at times. I am grateful that I was encouraged to walk the journey of release and embrace. I am in awe of that part of me who was willing to show up day after day for 40 days to read the booklet, create a post, and share her journey. I am grateful for those who read the posts and responded to them by sharing their own journey with me.
THANK YOU!
GRATITUDE
Today, I invite YOU to look at your Lenten Journey with Loving eyes and see the amazing work YOU have done. See that in your commitment to creating a closer relationship with the Divine and the Loving that is so impalpable in this word, you have become a representative of God. YOU walk as an ambassador of the Light spreading Loving Kindness and Peace in the world wherever you go. God Bless You!
THANK YOU for having joined me and read the daily blogposts I created – SEE THEM HERE (CLICK) – I hope you have joined the UNITY CONNECTED FACEBOOK GROUPwhere I also shared about the contemplative questions. (click on the buttons below to join)
Picture Source Unsplash/ Featured Image: rachel-walker–unsplash
Today, we are embracing our journey and God’s Love for us.
Our Lent Booklet reminds us today that when we look at Jesus’ story we realize that the most important things was his message. Resurrection is a metaphor for renewal. Jesus was an enlightened rabbi who showed the way to abundant living. During our Lenten journey we walked the road to Enlightenment, we have transformed our lives.
We are reminded that we have the power every day to transform our live experiences and rose above the past and turn our challenges into opportunities.
Today, I invite you to contemplate the quote below. Let me know how you have transformed you life over our Lenten Journey.
Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your minds, so that you may discern what is the will of God—what is good and acceptable and perfect. Romans 12:2
Today we affirm: I renew my mind with each new day.
Join me by reading the daily blogposts I create – SEE THEM HERE (CLICK) – and joining the UNITY CONNECTED FACEBOOK GROUP where I invite you to share about the contemplative questions. (click on the buttons below to join)
Picture Source Unsplash/ Featured Image: rachel-walker–unsplash
“A life without Love is of no account. Don’t ask yourself what kind of love you should seek, spiritual or material, divine or mundane, Eastern or Western. Divisions only lead to more divisions. Love has no labels, no definitions. It is what it is, pure and simple. Love is the water of life. And a lover is a soul of fire! The universe turns differently when fire loves water.“
I let go and look ahead with hope.
Today was an interesting day. All I did today was Loving myself through layers of limitations that I have uncovered over the past 40 days. I spent time in Forgiveness – I was being serious about it! – and then it occurred to me that true forgiveness is acceptance and loving what is. Forgiveness does not mean that I can force myself believing in something or doing something differently as of now. In forgiveness I compassionately embrace me with all my flaws Remember? “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.” (Luke 23:34) In this famous Bible quote I see Jesus’ Love for the world regardless of its great shortcomings. So, I did the same. I counted my flaws and just Loved them with a passion (and a smile)!
“A life without Love is of no account. Don’t ask yourself what kind of love you should seek, spiritual or material, divine or mundane, Eastern or Western. Divisions only lead to more divisions. Love has no labels, no definitions. It is what it is, pure and simple. Love is the water of life. And a lover is a soul of fire! The universe turns differently when fire loves water.”*
Today, we are tuly releasing and letting go and embracing God’s Love for us.
HOLY SATURDAY
Our Lent Booklet reminds us today that in Jesus’ death we observe the death of all old ideas and outdated beliefs. Like Mary and the disciples after Jesus’ demise, we feel lost not knowing what would happen next. It is a waiting and of uncertainty.
We pause in stillness, we experience the void then let it go. In that we trust that the flame of home in our hearts will be rekindled.
Today, I invite you to contemplate on Rule No40 and the quote below. Let me know how practicing ‘truly releasing and letting go in the silence’ worked for you today.
For God alone my soul waits in silence, for my hope is from him. Psalm 62:5
Today we affirm: I let go and look ahead with hope.
Join me by reading the daily blogposts I create – SEE THEM HERE (CLICK) – and joining the UNITY CONNECTED FACEBOOK GROUP where I invite you to share about the contemplative questions. (click on the buttons below to join)
Picture Source Unsplash/ Featured Image: rachel-walker–unsplash
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